Revelations

I have discovered a few things during this Confinement (read: self-imposed house arrest):

1. If ever you are planning to become a parent, or even grandparent in the near future, do not invest in any crystal/porcelain/glass filigree decorative items. If you do already have them, make sure you store them away in a lockable cupboard or room. Duct tape only lasts for a couple of weeks. Ain't no mountain too high for two gutsy boys to climb either.
2. Boys, at any age, love hi-tech gadgets. Especially laptops, digital cameras and PDA phones with stylus and QWERTY keypads. Don't even try fooling them with the plastic toy versions. Or any old model that doesn't have a working 2.5" LCD screen.
3. Boys, at any age, love to pretend they're Michael Schumacher - no, make that Lewis Hamilton.
4. The current crop of animated films like Madagascar, Over The Hedge etc may look like they're meant for kids, with all the cute animals and stuff - but they're not. Kids don't get their American jokes, the characters all have grown-up issues and idiosyncrasies and the only thing they pick up is how to behave like a rabid squirrel or a saltwater-spitting giraffe. And lemurs are scary.
5. Newborn baby girls are just as clingy and needy as their firstborn brothers. Well, maybe a notch lower.
6. Denial of the truth is the only acceptable logic for a 3-year-old.
7. Scolding doesn't work. Neither does punishing, reasoning, screaming, ignoring or giving in to their demands. NOTHING WORKS. Just pray and hope they grow out of it.
8. Women should really indulge in their pre-natal food cravings, even during labour. I had cheesecake 4 hours before giving birth to Nu'man and was perfectly happy for months later. But now all I can think of is Spaghetti Carbonara and Caramel Latte.

Just another week and I can finally get some personal space in a shopping complex somewhere.