Waiting for Abang Long

Assalamualaikum!

Yes, this blog has been left to collect cyberdust for ages. My other blog was more active until I found Goodreads that helps me keep track of my progress and read other reviews (some of which are literary gems in their own right!). The only reason that I am blogging right now is to keep myself occupied while waiting for darling Abang Long @ Nuaim to finish his homework.

Kids grow up so fast. When I started this blog (it wasn't so long ago, was it?), Nuaim was hardly more than a baby. In a way, this platform has seen the growth and development of my children - it was my constant companion throughout my confinements, with detailed records of all the pantang-larang and special post-natal menu. Now here I am, keeping Abang Long company while he finishes his Std 3 homework. Standard 3! And younger Abang Ngah is in Standard One! Aiesyah is now in pre-school, and although Sofiyyah is still too young for kindy, she actually looks as big as a four year old and is as talkative as her older siblings.

I'll be leaving them for two nights to attend a meeting in KL. As compensation, I have a lasagna in the fridge ready to be popped into the oven tomorrow evening, just before I leave for the airport from home. I have not told my in-laws of my impending trip - they'll usually take it upon themselves to stay the night at my house when I'm not around, much to the changrin of my domestic helper who feels put upon by MIL's nitpicking. I was planning to do so tonight, but as usual Nu'man would use up my phone battery playing 'Angry Birds' while Nuaim is just being an angry bird himself with his constant excuses to delay doing his homework. Now he's complaining of tiredness: he says it's because he did not take his nap this afternoon. I tell him it's because he spent all his energy on a tantrum about missing playtime instead of doing his homework earlier.

Aiesyah and Nu'man are still wide awake chatting away in my room, whereas Sofiyyah again decides to sleep downstairs with Disney Junior on TV. I'm not sure the sleeping arrangements will be like tomorrow - it depends on whether or not I get to tell my inlaws I'll be away. They'll probably get really annoyed with me if I don't tell them.

Poor princess

Today Aiesyah is four years old. We happen to be back at Damansara for an important function, so have planned for a sort of celebration tomorrow. Unfortunately she has a fever today - maybe from the trip yesterday. She still managed a smiling pose for the camera, though.
Get well soon dearest.

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This blog is still active...

...just about.

I admit that Facebook, being more accessible, has been the recipient of most updates.

There are also more paper notebooks and diaries lying around that I have decided to use (I need to justify my constant purchase of pens in various hues by doing some amount of writing). And of course, there is also the Global Reading Challenge that has updates on my book blog.

As a result, this blog has not received as much attention from its owner as it used to. So sorry about that.

I will remember to post some raya stories and photos, as well as next weekend's Malaysia Day trip, InsyaAllah. Right now I am planning to go for a short stay somewhere near, just some quality time with the kids and Hubby.

Butterfly butterfly, happy all day

Nuaim had a whole week off for Chinese New Year. We spent the first half of the break in Alor Setar - as I still had work at the office - then drove down to KL on Wednesday. I had promised Mak we would spend the first night at Putrajaya, so after a short two-hour stop at Damansara to offload and repack we arrived at dusk. My nieces and nephews were already there, they were spending the whole week 'balik kampung.'
The next day was a picnic brunch at Taman Putra Perdana. I made the mistake of skipping breakfast, so by the time we reached the picnic spot all I could think of was food. As a result of satisfying my hunger pangs, I missed out on all the fun of walking and running around the park with my kids. Must plan this again sometime.
That afternoon we were back at Damansara, where my sons would spend the next two days engrossed in PS2 whilst Aiesyah and I had girly lunch and coffee breaks. On Saturday we drove back to Sg Petani, only to find out Sunday was still a school holiday. I decided it should be a daytrip to Penang for the kids en route to sending off my brother at the airport. Having given Nuaim a choice of places to visit, he picked the Butterfly Farm and the Snake Temple. We could not make it in time to the Temple, so I will have to plan for another daytrip soon.

One butterfly that managed to stay in place long enough for me to snap a picture.

Beautiful specimens in the latest trendy colours.

Aiesyah having fun with my mini-highlighters at Starbucks.

Posing in front of Pavilion KL

The clan at Taman Putra Perdana. Shirtless Ziad is pretending to be Rambo while Hanina is damsel in distress with a blistered toe.

Sofiyyah among the cushions at Tarbush Restaurant, Batu Feringghi.

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The week that was

This week back in KL has been a whirlwind of activities. My itinerary of social engagements began even before we reached home on Saturday, with Abg Ashraf's eldest son's birthday party in Shah Alam. Initially Nuaim was not keen, but when we arrived, albeit one hour after the party was supposed to be over, there were still many of my cousins and their offspring around. By dusk and it was time to leave, I had some difficulty prying my children off the various wheeled toys.

The party mood continued the next day with an outing at Taman Desa Water Park to celebrate Naufal's birthday. He is two months younger than Aiesyah but a couple of inches taller, and they got along like a house on fire. With his cousin around, Naufal appeared more gungho and less timid, and my daughter was literally leading him on in her usual flirtatious manner.

Monday till Thursday I had a packed training session. There was a large group of us, about 18 persons, and as the last two days involved individual practicals (it was a Training of Trainers course) we only finished at six in the evening.

I was looking forward to a relaxing Friday but my kids had other ideas. They were looking forward to the Dino's Alive! exhibition at the National Science Centre, so my brother and I took the three of them there on Friday afternoon. I had learnt not to expect much, so I did not end up disappointed. Apart from a large T-rex and Apatosaurus in the foyer and two replica fossils in a chamber just inside one of the exhibition halls, the rest of the 32 models were small and repetitive. There must have been at least six velociraptors in various poses, mostly based on their appearance in Jurassic Park. My kids and brother had more fun playing with the permanent science exhibits and demo equipment. Fortunately the science exhibit is free, so I will make it a point to take them there for another visit in future.

That night Ain and I had to attend a wedding on behalf of our parents. It was the son of a close family friend who happens to be distantly related to my parents, and the bride's reception was at PJ Hilton. We were a bit stumped when a member of the meet-n-greet committee asked if we were attending Anita's wedding - neither of us had bothered to check the invite, and we weren't too sure of the groom's real name either (he had always been Abg Wi to us). Fortunately there was only that one wedding there, and some recognisable faces had already arrived so we joined them at the family table.

Saturday morning was shopping time. I had to buy Nuaim his new school clothes, and to get him to agree I promised that he could go to Kidzport after that. And so three sets of school uniform, two sets of sports clothes, two pairs of shoes and a new set of briefs later, the trio were safely dispatched to the play area and Ummi was RM90 the poorer for it. That amount of money also bought me about two hours of solo shopping, which of course meant more money was spent. This was in addition to a significant amount I already spent on stationery the day before. Kudos to Jasema for being a Pilot G2 retailer in so many colours.

Dinner was a family outing of sorts - Abg Wi's parents threw a small alfresco party just for relatives at his aunt's business premise, and the whole household was invited. The kids had a fun time running around, obviously there was still some excess energy from the day's events. However they had a dear price to pay for all that exertion.

Nu'man woke up the next morning complaining of a fever. After a dose of Panadol, he seemed better, but by teatime his temperature was high again. Since it was Sunday, I had to take him to the hospital where they administered a suppository to bring the fever down. This morning, after another dose at bedtime, he appears on the road of recovery. Unfortunately his brother is now suffering and received the same treatment from a private clinic.

Right now we are on our way back to Alor Setar with my inlaws. I am praying that the girls are hale and hearty enough not to fall ill like their brothers, and that the rest of the year will be smooth sailing. This week has been memorable enough.

Here's hoping for a vibrantly colourful new year! (One pen for each month)

Nu'man feeling better on the journey to Alor Setar.

Nuaim and T-rex

Aiesyah and cousin Naufalsaurus.

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Siren Song

She waits.

His image is a shapeless thought, she is wary to give it a true form. Afraid of what the thought can be, and the calling that comes with it.

There is a familiar thrill, like an old friend returned from a long journey unchanged. But she herself has changed, and she is afraid of what this thrill can lead to.

He is near, too close by to miss her song if she sings it. She lets her thought form a name, hesitates to say it. Already his image is clearer, she can see his face in her mind. The name and the face. Nothing else.

She sends the thought out into the night air without a voice. And waits.

************

He feels her song probe his mind. A voiceless call, yet it thunders in his soul. He has been waiting for it, knowing more than she that eventually it would come to this.

The siren cannot refuse her nature, and her call must be answered.

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Red Woman

She is strong and tough, sometimes stubborn. She expects to be in command, and others to willingly follow.

She is a woman of ambition. To be the best that she can be, first among equals.

But she is also a woman of needs and desires, and wishes to be needed and desired.

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10.10gmt @10.10.10

Nuaim has school on Sundays, so I marked the auspicious moment by watching tv with Nu'man and Aiesyah. As the long hand of the clock moved to the mqgic number, Aiesyah started crying for her bottle of milk, while Nu'man had fallen asleep. There was nothing else to watch on TV but a Ben 10 movie on Cartoon Network.

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Weight by arithmetic

Today Sofiyyah is five months old. A month ago, just before Aidil Fitri, she was 7.5kg. This morning, I stepped onto the weighing scale with her in my arms.

Weight with Sofiyyah = 58.7kg

Weight without Sofiyyah = 50.1kg.

?!?!?!?

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Sofiyyah's Progress

At birth
Weight 3.3kg
Length 48 cm

4 months later
Weight 7.5 kg
Length 65 cm

She's already outgrown 6mth clothing. I had to buy 12-18mth sizes to fit her chest and thighs.

And I think she's teething. Breastfeeding is beginning to turn into a painful activity.

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Reminiscing Raya

As a child, Aidil Fitri meant a 10-hour drive back to Kelantan - a necessary evil for me who suffered from travel sickness. It was worst when travelling by day due to the heat. In those early years, the route to Kelantan was via Kuantan then up the coast of Terengganu. We would have to cut through hills and a mountain range, and the sight of the barren rock faces flanking the roads would send waves of nausea throuh me.
I tried taking pills to stop myself from throwing up on whomever was unlucky enough to sit next to me in the car, but I could never swallow them, despite their tiny size and my mother's attempts to make them more palatable by incorporating them in bread or banana. Eventually I would have to crush the pill and down it with lots of water to take away the bitterness. At times I would plead with my father to travel at night, but Mak would tell me off for selfishly making him drive when he was tired and sleepy.
As we made it a point to celebrate the eve of Aidifitri at my father's kampung, there were times when we would have to break fast on the road. One time we arrived at Tok Wan's house just in time for sahur. While everyone immediately filled up, my brother refused to eat because Tok Wan did not prepare sweet sour garoupa (we'd been having it constantly throughout that particular Ramadhan that our kitchen expenses were higher than for other months). After some cajoling, he finally agreed to have an omelette instead. The next day my grandmother scoured the markets of Pasir Putih and finally managed to find a small specimen to cook her favourite grandchild his favourite dish.
Tok Wan was famous for her ketupat daun palas and satay. On the eve of Eid, she would spend hours in the kithchen threading pieces of marinated meat on skewers or filling up glutinous rice into cones made of palas leaves. Sometimes I would help her in these tasks, but I never worked on them long enough to inherit the recipes as there was always something more exciting happening in the front lawn - Ayah's fireworks display.
Every year without fail he would stock up on a variety of colourful and splendid fireworks, and all the children of the village would gather in front of Tok Wan's house, while the ladies watched from the windows. We would clap and cheer at the multi-coloured bursts and whizzes as Ayah lit up one firework after another, and the night would end with handheld sparklers that would invariably find a victim or two.
I can't remember the last time I saw that firework show. After SPM I went directly to England for my A-Levels and first degree, so for 6 whole years I celebrated Eid away from my family. The first Raya after I finished my studies was subdued - Ayah had passed away two years previously, and Tok Wan was never the same cheerful person ever since. That year she was particularly ill, and it was a week after Raya that she was diagnosed with advanced stage intestinal cancer. She passed away on the 14th of Syawal that same year. No more ketupat daun palas, and the fireworks sparkled no more.

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Caftan oh caftan

Inspired by my friend's post (http://ladyverde.blogspot.com/2010/08/settled-kautimbaju-raya-checked.html), I decided to check out some caftans near Damansara Perdana yesterday. I wasn't really intending to buy one for raya, just to see what I'd look like in one.
The first boutique I went to was Puteh. It carries a range of caftans designed by Rizalman Ibrahim, and I've seen enough of his designs to know that they're gorgeous. And really they are, but with a 4-digit price tag and extra-long length I decided to just admire them on the rack rather than on my body.
The next boutique I went to was Galeri Muslimah just round the corner. It's actually a showroom for a range of tudung and accessories as well as clothes, and does both retailand wholesale. I picked out a gold satin caftan and matching yellow tudung to try on. It looked quite big, but with hidden tiebacks to alter the fit. Sorry no photos :-))
I have to admit I felt like a goddess, and began to picture myself lying on a chaise-lounge like Cleopatra witj the voluminous sleeves spread all around me, but when I stepped out of the fitting room to show Hubby his first response was: "Ni nak pakai tidur ke pi jalan2?"

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An angel in the morning

This is the face I see when I wake up from sleep.

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Golden Goose

This article was sent to me by Hubby some days ago.

Remember the tale of the goose that laid the golden egg? How the owners got greedy and killed the goose to get at what they thought was a horde of golden eggs inside the goose, only to find nothing but goosey guts?

Although the moral of the story is primarily about greed, the writer of that article took another angle, and took the goose, instead of the farmer, to represent individuals with unique talents and abilities. What if, he asks, the goose allowed itself to be victimised? The golden goose that allows itself to waste away.

I'm expanding the theory even further here - what if the goose has already laid its last golden egg, but the farmer is still expecting it to produce wealth? What if you've expended the last drop of your creativity and skills, and have nothing more to offer, but because of this crazy competitive world the farmer keeps urging you on, believing that your glorious past is still present well into the future?

I feel spent. I hope it's just a phase, and that this phase, like the others before it, shall pass.

Money money money

What would you spend money on? Assuming you have more than enough stashed away for retirement, would you spend money on material things or life experiences? And would you spend it all on yourself or on your loved ones?
I find myself in a dilemma when I have extra cash in hand. Of course like any other member of the female species I like beautiful clothes, jewellery and luxury items - but another side of me (the side that turned me into an engineer, obviously) will want to rationalise every purchase that I end up not buying them. It's either because I already have something like it or I don't have the space to store it. I really do not mind spending a lot of money on something if I get good mileage out of it and it does not end up cluttering my already limited real estate.
The same goes when I buy stuff for people. By all means my mother and sisters can go shopping on my account, but I have to believe in their cause. Which is why I'd pay for my sister's work clothes but not another one's date outfits. And why I'd fork out a large sum for a new kitchen with additional storage space and new appliances, but not rebuild the wet kitchen as well just because there've always been two kitchens - despite one being totally underutilised except as storage space for items you didn't even know you had. I'd rather spend the money on foodstuff and travelling and good service.
So, where shall I go on holiday as an excuse to buy a beautiful knee-length winter coat from Zara?

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Needs and Wants List Updates

Referring to my needs and wants post, here's an update:

• Car seat - I went for the Combi Coccoro in Carrot Cake - the 4C's! I haven't tested Sofiyyah in it yet, though.
• Nursing clothes - I bought the Diva tank tops from The Baby Loft one in each of the 5 colours. To ge with these are cheapo leggings that are for wearing underneath my coveralls.
• Newborn teats - MIL already bought a pack of 3 a few weeks back, and I also bought some extra bottles. Which is a good thing, because Sofiyyah is quite a guzzler and I've used up all the 150ml bottles that came with the Medela Harmony pump. Hopefully the 5 bottles of EBM stocked in the freezer will be sufficient for at least two working days. Just in case, there's some standby Formula milk, although I hope it won't have to come to that.
• Milk collection shells - the ones online are sold out. I'll have to find some when I go back to KL next week.
• Haircut - Not yet.
• Fix watch - Not yet.
• New phone - my phone is very temperamental nowadays, losing signals and battery strength with unpredictable frequency. I am torn between two phones offered by Maxis:

Samsung Galaxy S

HTC Desire

Or should I just wait for the QWERTY versions to hit our shores?

Post-natal resolution

Having 4 babies certainly has obvious physical effects. It could also be age catching up - it's true what they say about hitting 30. I definitely need to put in a lot more effort to get toned. This is going to be tough - sit-ups, crunches and any form of regimented exercise has never been my thing.

So in a bid to get me started, I have bought new sports shoes, a yoga mat and signed up to play netball at the office. There's also some magazine cut-outs ("How to get Gorgeous Legs in 4 weeks" - I wish!) that I will put into practice with semi-religious zeal. And hopefully nursing the baby plus running after the 3 older kids will make up for all the work-outs I've already put off.

When nothing seems right...

...what should one do? Fix things one at a time, or just blitz everything to obliteration and start straight from scratch? Is there a limit to what's fixable, so that you know when you've gone beyond that limit (the point of no return), it's better to just get rid of all the broken and irreparable and begin with a fresh clean slate.

And what if it's your life we're talking about here?

Balik Kay Ell

Alhamdulillah, we arrived at my mum's house in Damansara safe and sound around 5.30 p.m. Although there was a slight drizzle before we started on our journey, the weather was kind - no rain, a bit cloudy, a few sunny spots but not too hot - perfect for travelling with kids over a 444km distance.

Sofiyyah was an angel - she spent most of the trip sleeping. Even the few times she was awake there was hardly any sound from her, let alone a cry, but her eyes were open to take in the different scenery. Despite this being her first trip in the SUV, she settled into it very well - must be a familiar sensation from all my driving during pregnancy. Even Nu'man's horseplay didn't bother her.

My brother apparently has been really busy. He had installed a ceiling fan and new lights in the guest room where I usually stay, bought a new sofa bed for the kids' playroom, and a new HDTV. The existing TV set has been moved downstairs "so the boys can easily play video games" - which they are happily doing now.

As for me, it's back to the familiar Confinement regime - already agreed for Kak Yam to come in first thing Saturday morning for my massage. I've got a hot water bottle behind my back, and no more fried fish or chicken in my meals.

I'll be spending 2 weeks here, which means the boys get an extra week off school. I hope it doesn't mean they'll miss much from kindergarten - especially as they've got tests immediately after we arrive back in Alor Setar!

To buy or not to buy?

Poor Sofiyyah! Being the baby of the bunch means she gets mostly hand-me-downs from her brothers and sister. However, I am thinking of making an exception here.

I was initially planning to reuse Nuaim's old car-seat, however after 6 years it's beginning to look tattered and worn out. Besides, it's BLUE! Aiesyah already has to suffer with a blue Graco car-seat (another hand-me-down from Abang Long), so I'm thinking of a more gender-neutral colour for Sofiyyah.

So last night, I surfed through the Internet and found a couple of really nice-looking car seats, including seat/stroller combos such as these on The Baby Loft:

Halford Premier Zeus Baby Car-Seat (up to 4 years)

Combi Coccoro convertible car-seat - apparently these take up very little space in the car,

The Halford Cosmo DX Travel System,

or the Quinny Zapp-Maxi-Cosi Cabriofix (at 25% discount!)?

Or should I make use of the Maclaren RM100 voucher I just discovered in one of the baby gift packs this morning? Except that they only have strollers, so I'll still need to spend an extra amount of money on a car seat - and end up with 2 strollers.

Oooh, the Quinny Zapp is beginning to look so attractive!